Are Millenials Self-Absorbed or Searching for Authenticity?
STORY BY Elizabeth Heubeck PHOTOGRAPHY BY Mary C. Gardella
Over the last decade, many workplaces were introduced to a new breed of colleagues that stopped us in our tracks: They were confident, often 
bordering on cocky; they were bright and could run circles around us when it came to technology. The first true “digital natives,” they grew up with technology; and they made little attempt to conform to unwritten rules of office dress code (think nose rings and tattoos) or demeanor, often flooring us with their unabashed disregard for traditional hierarchy that says senior employees get seniority.
Those who grew up in the preceding decades, in the days before participation trophies and helicopter parenting, may have found this new breed bewildering. We played by the rules, accepted mind-numbing jobs after graduating from college and dreamed of McMansions and minivans. Not so those born between 1980 and 2000 (according to the U.S. Census Bureau).
Millennials – or members of Generation Y – have been examined intensely by sociologists, marketers and human resources pros. They’ve also been called a lot of names: narcissistic, coddled and even delusional – perhaps most infamously in a landmark “Time” magazine article, The Me Me Me Generation. On the flip side, they’ve also been defined as confident, optimistic and open to new ways of living. Labels aside, one common thread does appear to run through the lives of millennials: a desire to live authentically.
The end result of this common goal of authenticity can look wildly different. Consider the three Howard County-based millennials interviewed for this article: a young entrepreneur, a professional who insists on working only for an organization where her work-life values are honored, and a woman striving to navigate the oft-lonely road of motherhood and a demanding full-time job. Through their stories, it becomes clear that while it may be unfair to pigeonhole millennials, certain generation-specific influences have shaped their paths.
A YOUNG ENTREPRENEUR
A YOUNG ENTREPRENEURConsider Kelsey Kleinhen, the 23-year-old owner of Kelsey’s Kloset, a clothing boutique in Laurel. Like many other millennials eager to be their own boss, Kleinhen actually achieved that dream – at the age of 19. Considering she’d been in the workforce since 13, her career move didn’t seem that drastic.
“I started working as soon as I was old enough to,” Kleinhen says. After stints at a pizza and burger joint and as a nanny, she decided to apply her intense work ethic to a career move she believed would be more gratifying. “I always gave 110 percent in my jobs. So I felt like if I was going to continue to work this way, I’d prefer to do it on my own,” she says. So she did.
She started sensibly and small. A self-described “fashionista,” Kleinhen knew she wanted to open a clothing store. Using money she had saved as a nanny and receiving some financial support from her family, she identified a spot at 11200 Scaggsville Road and quickly got to work building out the store. She used materials from Home Depot; help from her father, an electrician; and the assistance of other handy acquaintances. Without the capital to buy new clothing, she opened her boutique first as a consignment store, filling it with gently used clothing collected from family and friends. Less than five years later, she has realized her dream by turning it into a store that sells exclusively new retail and has begun to turn a small profit.
Kleinhen tosses around terms like search engine optimization, company culture and mentoring as comfortably as someone with an advanced business degree. Yet she eschewed years of secondary education in favor of a quick exit from high school at the age of 16, after earning an online degree. “School just wasn’t for me,” Kleinhen declares.
But she insists she’s always learning. Involvement in local business networking groups, online courses, 
and old-fashioned trial and error have complemented what appears to be Kleinhen’s natural knack for entrepreneurship.
Noting the high student loan debt that haunts so many of her peers and the fact that she’s found career happiness at such a young age, Kleinhen appears to harbor no regrets about choosing to open a business over attending college. The results of a recent, widespread poll on millennials, college and career satisfaction might make Kleinhen even more satisfied with her decision.
A poll released in 2015 by Clark University surveyed 1,000 millennials from differing educational, socioeconomic and geographic backgrounds about education and work. Of those polled, 40 percent agreed that their degree did not result in the work opportunities they thought it would.
“They aren’t just looking for a way to make a living, they’re idealistic about the kind of work they hope to find,” says Jeff Arnett, director of the poll, commenting in an August 2015 article in MarketWatch.com.
INSISTENT ON WORK-LIFE BALANCE
INSISTENT ON WORK-LIFE BALANCEThey also seek workplaces that share their values, particularly those relating to work-life balance. Scores of surveys polling workers about workplace priorities demonstrate that flexibility ranks at the top of the list for millennials. In a 2015 survey of almost 10,000 workers by Ernst & Young’s Global Generations Research, many millennials asserted that they would consider a pay cut, sacrifice a promotion or move in order to achieve greater work-life balance. Almost 40 percent of millennial respondents from the U.S., male and female, reported a willingness to move out of the country because of discontent over the nation’s lack of paid parental leave policies.
Erin Heilman can relate. The 28-year-old Columbia resident recently left her job in marketing at a small company because of the organization’s inflexibility regarding employee leave. “Maternity leave is such a strong value that I could not sacrifice it,” she says. In her previous job, she says, “I would only be allowed a short amount of time off without the risk of losing my job. That was a deal breaker.”
Incidentally, Heilman wrote about her generation’s unwillingness to bend their values in an opinion piece that appeared in the “Baltimore Sun,” The millennial work ethic. In it, she wrote: As Millennials, we fight to make our world fair … We demand better care, better government, better education, better technology, better food and better working conditions.
Heilman, who is married, has no children yet. But considering her future and how she intends to approach motherhood, she decided she won’t compromise her values for her employer’s policies. “I had to make a decision: Am I going to sacrifice my values, or move on and find a better place?” she says.
DISILLUSIONED BY THE MESSAGE ‘YOU CAN HAVE IT ALL’
Unlike Heilman, Megan O’Connor never thought she would have to make compromises to achieve her professional and personal goals. But she’s discovered that’s not the case.
“I had an expectation that having it all – working and being a parent – would be easy. I feel like my generation got brought up on this lie that you can do it all,” says O’Connor, an attorney and mother of three children who lives in Howard County.
There’s strong data to support O’Connor’s assertions. People her age, “have been told that they can do anything they want to do and be anything they want to be,” states a recent report on Millennials from the U.S. Chamber of Commerce Foundation.
Now, as one of the only women among her friends well into the throes of motherhood, O’Connor admits she’s finding the juggle of marriage, parenthood and profession quite challenging. “Frankly, I am a really capable person. I have succeeded in every aspect of my life. “But now I feel like, whoa. This is way more than I bargained for,” she says. “I’m still learning 10 years after becoming a mother that it’s way harder to balance motherhood and a career than I was made to believe growing up.”
Her advice to the current generation of children? “I say let them play. Have more fun.”
O’Connor’s advice runs counter to how she was raised in a tightly scheduled world where 35-hour weeks of gymnastic practice was the norm, as was striving for perfection on the gymnastic floor and in the classroom. Perhaps O’Connor is eyeing a more ”authentic” life for her own children, one that will allow them to reach adulthood with a greater sense of balance than she experienced growing up. As with every rising generation, it will be interesting to see if her offspring will heed parental advice, reject it altogether or create a new version that works for them. *
MILLENNIALS’ NEEDS INFLUENCE COUNTY PLANNING
Many millennials are considered minimalists. They don’t necessarily aspire to the sprawling houses their parents did – even if they grew up in them. Nor are they as easily impressed by luxury cars. In fact, they are driving fewer miles than folks in older generations; some appear in no rush to get their driving licenses. The forward-thinking Howard County government is making changes to its housing and transportation options with this up-and-coming generation’s lifestyle in mind.
HOUSING
Downtown Columbia is preparing for a major facelift, and the aging town center’s redevelopment plan includes 5,500 new residential units. With this significant addition to Columbia’s housing stock will come a shift in residential composition. Apartment units will rise from 24 percent to 32 percent of total housing, while detached single family houses will drop from 53 percent to 48 percent. As many millennials struggle financially to get out of their parents’ basement and afford to live on their own, shared apartment units present an attractive option.
PUBLIC TRANSPORTATION
Howard, Anne Arundel and northern Prince George’s counties and the city of Laurel have collaborated on a new mass transit system partnership. The Regional Transportation Agency of Central Maryland (RTA) draws from multiple jurisdictions for a more efficient transportation system across central Maryland. RTA offers a comprehensive website for consumers with schedules, online ticket buying options, news including weather-related bus delays and more. Click to learn more: marylandtransit.org.
BIKE MASTER PLAN
Howard County recently implemented its first ever Bicycle Master Plan. Led by the Office of Transportation, the plan – Bike Howard – intends to guide local residents interested in using bicycles for both transportation and recreation. Still in its early stages, the plan aims mainly to increase residents’ safety and comfort level with bicycling. Those are the broad strokes. For the ambitious details, read more here: bikehoward.com.
